I went to the mall today and came back with nothing. I feel like a failure. Who goes to the mall and buys nothing. Especially in December! *sigh* Some people are so hard to shop for.
My english exam went well. But what I'm really happy about is my final paper for that class, which we got back after we handed in our exam. And I got an 89 :D I'm so happy. And this is what my prof had to say: "This was a real pleasure to read, Heather - great ideas, very well researched, and carefully argued. Except now I'm a bit depressed about social media..." (my paper was about how mobile phones are ruining our real life interactions). Coming from her [the prof], that means a lot. I've done really well in this class, I think my lowest mark was an 83. And it's not like the course was easy or that the prof was an easy marker, because she said most of the marks are in the low 70s. So I'm pretty happy with myself. That professor was also the best professor I've ever had. She also gave me a 93 on the revised response paper (which I'm pretty sure I talked about before). I literally went up 4% because I added 5 words and fixed a typo. Man, that class was great.
283. How is the weather right now?
Well, from looking out my window, I can tell you that Waterloo is currently...dark. Not windy, high probability of it being cold. Nothing falling from the sky.
284. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Their appearance. And I would just like to say something, because I think this question is fishing for what I call, a beauty pageant answer. "Oh, the first thing I notice about boys is their stunning personality!" No. No, I'm sorry, it's really not. The first thing you notice about someone is their appearance. You have no other option! Unless you meet them online or some other way that would not involve seeing them. But if you're walking down the street, the first thing you're going to notice is not their ability to crack jokes.
285. Do you have a significant other?
No.
(But Benedict does and this is what he said about her:
He's so adorable. They are so frickin cute together. )
I have reached that horrible part of the day where I have told myself that I have so much stuff to do that I couldn't possibly have a moment of spare time, but here I am, with apparently nothing to do. I always do this to myself. I'll have an assignment or something to do and I'll say, "this is going to take forever. No goofing off. No free time." But then I get the thing done, and I am just sitting here in the mind set that I don't have free time. I hate it. Especially this time, because I'm working on this paper, and I've broken it down into parts, so I do so much every day. So technically I'm not done yet, but I've finished today's quota. And I really do not want to do more on it. (I'm not going to, that wasn't me asking for your opinion on whether I should do work or not). Maybe I'll go to bed (but *GASP* it's only 9:30!)
I have a full day tomorrow. Quite literally, and in a way that I've never had before. I have class from 10-11:20, then a break till 1 (during which I'm going to do more work on my paper). From 1-2:20 I have class again, then another 1.5hr break (where I will do even more work on my paper). At 4, I have a lab for 1hr20mins. Then I'm going to go buy dinner (because I refuse to carry around a lunch and a dinner all day) then head over to a 3hr practicum starting at 6. And it's probably not a good idea to wear new shoes on a long day, but I'm going to anyway because I really want to wear them. Wish me luck.
On the plus side, there's only 66 days till Christmas, and 54 days till I get to go home for Christmas break! Send me your wish lists now, because I am in the Christmas mood (which kind of sucks because once reality sinks in, I'm going to realize that Christmas is still two months away :( )
269. Turn Ons
(I am going to take this in a non-sexual direction)
- humour
- confidence
- yeah that's all I got
- I don't know!
- do people actually talk about these things?
- I guess it would probably help if I had been in a relationship or something so that I knew what I liked
- he's gotta smell nice
I finally told Josh that I didn't have the same feelings that he has for me. I did it over text. Which is probably more horrible than I'm thinking it is. But there was no way I would have been able to tell him in person. And if I did, then it would be awkward, because now he would know, but would we then continue to hang out? Or would it just be a really awkward conversation and then bye? I dunno. I'm just glad to have it off my chest. But I still feel horrible. This is what I sent him: "Hi Josh. I need to tell you before we meet again that while I'm flattered by your feelings for me, I don't see you in the same way. You're a great guy, and you don't deserve to be led on like that."
Is that okay?! Is that acceptable?! I'VE NEVER HAD TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS BEFORE. And then, do you want to know what he sent back? "Oh icic well thanks for letting me know:)" It took me a second to realize what the "icic" meant. And it kills me, because there's usually a minimum of 2 emoticons per text and I could tell in that text that he was hurt/sad. And it's killing me! I'm a horrible person. I feel kind of like this right now:
On the one hand, I'm free from that guilt of leading him on, but on the other hand, I feel horrible for hurting his feelings. Ugh. I don't know how girls deal with this all the time.
On a completely different note, I've been listening to Shane & Shane a lot recently. They're a Christian band and I really like them. I'm not exactly where I got their music from, probably from one of the times I air-dropped with people at camp. But really like their sound. I also recently found out about Lecrae, who is a Christian hip-hop artist. I've only listened to a couple of his songs, but I really like them. I really like the messages in his songs.
257. Are your friends mainly guys or girls?
Girls (and I apparently just destroyed my one guy friendship).
(I'm back!)
Everything's going pretty well in the new apartment. Still haven't met two of the girls...one hasn't even moved in yet. Oh well. I'm not complaining. My room is small, but I'm making it work. Now that most of my stuff is up off the floor, it seems bigger :) (I have a lot of stuff. Too much, really. Although I'm realizing now that I did not bring a lot of shirts with me. Guess I'll have to go shopping!)
This is the view out my window:
Pretty dece.
lol jk
This is actually the view out my window. Could be worse, I suppose. At least I'm not looking directly at another apartment building, which is what one would expect in this area. It will take some getting used to living in the apartment, but I'm sure it will all be fine. The biggest thing for me will probably be thinking of meals to eat. Not even making them is an issue for me, just thinking of what to eat. Maybe I'll just continue on with the camp menu, but with added peanut butter :)
Also I don't know if this is weird or creepy, but I made a picture of Elliot my desktop background and it makes me smile every time I see it. I'm going to miss him so much.
Speaking of boys, Josh is very eager to see me. Like, he hasn't even moved in yet and he's already asking to see me tomorrow. He's already said that he really likes me, but I don't know how I feel about him. But I now understand when girls say they don't know how to break it off. I totally understand that. Because even though we haven't actually had a thing yet, I don't want to crush his hopes and dreams. Ugh. I can't deal with all this drama. I don't know how girls do this all the time.
I'm not going to catch up with the QOTD because I haven't posted in over a month, but I'll do a few and will continue on with them.
245. Opinion on insecurities.
I think everyone has them or has had them at some point. I think they are completely justified and people are entitled to have them.
246. Do you miss how things were a year ago?
Well, a year ago I was a lot more homesick than I am right now and was stepping into first year university not knowing anything, so not really.
247. Have you ever been to New York?
I think I landed at their airport once? I know that I flew over New York City once, because I remember seeing the Statue of Liberty from the air.
248. What is your favourite song at the moment?
Afire Love by Ed Sheeran
249. Age and Birthday?
18, but only for another couple weeks.
Sunday, 27 July 2014
I've been stressing about school stuff all weekend, but I think I've finally got it all figured it out. Fingers crossed.
Now, I haven't posted since June 23, 34 days ago. That means I have to answer 34 QOTD. Here goes nothing.
211. Would you change your name?
If they mean, would I change my name today, I would say no. But if they mean if I could go back and start with a new name, I might say yes. I don't know what I would change my name to, though.
212. What is your zodiac sign?
Libra.
213. Do you like Subway?
Yes (and I wish I had figured that out earlier).
214. Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?
Contemplate what life would be like with him.
215. Who's the last person you had a deep conversation with?
I've had quite a few life chats recently with people at camp.
217. Can you count to one million?
In theory, yes.
218. Dumbest lie you ever told?
The dentist asked if I wanted the fan turned off, and I said no, but I was really cold and wished I could turn the fan off.
219. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?
Closed.
220. Curly or straight hair?
Wavy.
221. How tall are you?
5'9"
222. Brunette or blonde?
Brunette.
223. Summer or winter?
Summer (but actually spring).
224. Night or day?
Day.
225. Favourite month?
May? September? I dunno.
226. Are you a vegetarian?
No.
227. Dark, milk or white chocolate?
Milk.
228. Tea or coffee?
Tea.
229. Was today a good day?
It has turned out to be a good one, with a couple of hiccups along the way.
230. What's your favourite quote?
"I always have a quote for everything - it saves original thinking." ~Dorothy L. Sayers
or "Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord, rather than for people." ~Colossians 3:23
231. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what's the first line?
"But Judah said to him, "The man warned..." (It's the Bible, in case you didn't get that. I have to admit, when I originally read through these questions I was really excited about this one and I am slightly disappointed that it was the Bible. )
232. What would you name your future kids?
Jacob, Ethan, Asher, Benjamin. I really like Jezebel, but that has a bad connotation.
233. What are you looking forward to?
I'm going on a little trip to the states this week :) Also, I'm getting baptized this summer!
234. Is there anyone who can always make you smile?
My roommate Lindsay makes me smile at the randomest times with the randomest things.
235. Is it hard for you to get over someone?
I've never had someone to get over.
236. What was your life like last year?
Pretty average, it was good. A new experience.
237. Have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?
No.
238. Who did you last see in person?
My BFFLAAT.
239. Are you good at hiding your feelings?
I personally think I follow after my dad a bit and don't show as many emotions as other people. I, however, do not make an attempt to hide what I'm feeling, leading me to believe that I'm not good at hiding my feelings.
240. What is something you want right now?
For this list to be over already. Never again will I do so many at once. I also wish I was asleep.
241. How do you feel right now?
Tired. Hot because of the humidity but cold enough that I want a blanket.
242. When was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?
Friday.
243. Personality description.
Oh wow this is a big one. I think I am:
- patient
- quiet
- caring
- funny
- sarcastic
- intelligent
- have common sense
- introvert
- organized
- a leader when the situation calls for it
- genuine
I dunno what else to say. Feel free to add on to the list.
244. Have you ever wanted to tell someone something but haven't?
Almost every day of my life.
There we go. All caught up. Maybe in another month I'll post again. No promises.
Sunday, 30 March 2014
Ok so Josh does this thing where I'll be eating by myself and he sits somewhere else, because he doesn't see me. But then once he's seated he'll see that I'm also eating, more noticeably alone. However, by the time he works up the courage to come and sit with me, I'll have finished eating. I'll be getting up and leaving. And every single time (because it has happened multiple times), he'll be on his way over or just about to get up to move, he'll see me leaving and I can see how he dies a little inside. And now that I'm typing this out, I'm realizing: am I being mean? Should I just sit there and let him come over? Man, I dunno about any of this stuff.
I'm doing a project about digital worlds and our "second lives". I'm doing a wedding scene where the couple is texting their vows to each other. I asked Josh if I could take a picture of his hands holding a phone. And so now our phone conversation has wedding vows in it...
129. What are your favourite stores to shop in?
I'm going to limit it to stores where I could/would actually buy something, because for all you know, I could be taking the bus every weekend to Pandora and admiring everything I can never have. I like Winners, (Old Navy???), Forever 21 (kind of), I don't know. I'm not really a person who has to have branded clothes, it's really just whatever is cheapest. I've had a craving to go thrift shopping recently...(CAMP!)
You should all go play 2048. It's ruining my life because it's so addicting and I have studying to be doing.
Today was a long day. There was Stratford of course (I'm so glad I only have to go back one more time then I'm done...until September at least). And then this evening I went to see a concert of all the UWaterloo A Capella groups preform. It was really good. I quite enjoy a cappella. More so when it's songs I know, because I can reference how close they are to coming to replicating the song. But it was all good. Also one of my newer friends was singing in it and she wanted me to see it, so I thought I would go and support her. Some songs they did were Bravado, Say Something, Let It Go (!!!) and a Michael Jackson song that I am currently forgetting. The show was over 2 hours though, so it was a but rough because I'd already been sitting all day. I've discovered that a good time to go on tumblr is when it's late, 1) because that's when everybody else is on and there's more stuff being posted and 2) I'm tired, so it doesn't take much to make me laugh really hard. And laughing is always fun :)
127. What do you say during awkward silences?
(after waiting to see if the other person/people will break the silence): Ok, well I'll see you later? (i.e. I try to get out of them)
128. Describe your dream girl/guy.
My dream guy would be taller than me*, broader build. Not necessarily muscular but strong, short hair. He would make me laugh, treat me like a lady, but not be afraid to goof off. Christian. Accept me for who I am, get along with my friends and family. Not a smoker (or any other drugs for that matter). Not a fan of alcohol. Likes to read, listen to (my) music, watch movies. Won't get jealous or angry when I fantasize about Benedict Cumberbatch. Wants to have kids. Is ok with staying in. Have similar financial views to me. Polite.
But might I just bring these back:
Friday night was Renison's Wind Out. Everybody gets dressed up to go to the Delta hotel in Kitchener and have a very nice dinner. They gave out some of the awards and then there was a dance. It was pretty fun, but I've never been much of a dance person. When we got back at about 11:30, my friends and I ordered pizza and had another dance party in one of the lounges. Then we all slept in one room, like a sleepover. It was a lot of fun. Until 9:30AM, that is, when the fire alarm went off. According to the dons, the fire alarm was supposed to go off at 1pm. The thing I want to know is who decided that a fire alarm the day after Wind Out (where there was a bar) would be a good idea? And then who thought it would be a good idea to do it in the morning?! Because I had slept in my friends room, I didn't have my jacket or proper shoes. I was standing outside in shorts, a t-shirt and flip-flops in below zero temperatures for over half a hour. Then one of the sweetest things that has ever happened to me happened: Josh came over and gave me his jacket. Like seriously, these types of things don't happen to me. But then he was shy and so just kind of walked away after he gave it to me. I was able to thank him later when I gave it back. But that's like the sweetest thing that's ever happened to me. Then I spent all of yesterday in my friends room, a majority of that time occupying a portion of her bed. I did manage to get some work done on my peanut butter report*, but it was an overall very lazy day. I watched a couple episodes of Hannibal. I'm enjoying it, but it's some pretty dense stuff. I would find myself halfway through the episode all tense and holding my breath. But fun times and lazy days will soon be over because there are only 2 (TWO!!) weeks of classes left and then the dreaded exams. Ugh. I am so ready for everything to be over (and for camp to start!!!)
123. Spell your name with your chin.
Since I am in a public place, I will retain my dignity and do this later.
124. Do you play sports? What sports?
I don't play any sports. Unless belaying can be consider a sport...
Question Backstory: A majority of the world is right-handed (70-90% according to Wikipedia). We do a majority of our tasks with our right hand and the left hand is noticeably less able. Some countries drive on the left hand side of the road, while others drive on the right (such as ourselves). We use our right hand to change gears in standard vehicles. In places where people drive on the left hand side of the road (or, have right seated drivers), they switch gears with their left hand. This leads me to...
Question: Speaking about right handed people, would drivers in countries where they drive on the left hand side of the road have more-able left hands (because they use their left hands to switch gears) than those of us who drive on the right hand side (and switch gears with our right)?
Just a thought that's been on my mind...
In other Heather news, I had my FCC interview today. It went well. And I don't want to assume or get my hopes up, but if (when) they hire me, it's totally going to be for FSM (food service manager). Just sayin'.
Also, I love it when I find new Bastille music. Because I swear they are purposely not putting half their stuff on iTunes just to spite me. Makes it more exciting for me though I guess, because I get new music even when they aren't actually releasing anything. They won a Brit award, congrats to them!
99. Do you think you'll be in a relationship two months from now?
I might be, I might not be.
100. (Wow! 100 questions already!) Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?
Well, Josh keeps bringing himself up because he's been texting me. About the weather. We're not even in the same city! (And for a while, we weren't even in the same hemisphere! Well, close to it at least)
Apps this good, whose got time to make friends?
- A Wake, Macklemore & Ryan Lewis feat. Evan Roman
Wednesday, 12 February 2014
Since, you've all been asking, here's how the bubble tea outing went (it's just copied from an email, so it might read a little weird? maybe not): The outing with Josh was ok. We walked over to the plaza and got bubble tea and sat in the store while drinking the tea. We just chatted. We haven't talked a lot so we were just kind of getting to know each other better. But we're both awkward at having conversations, so that makes things interesting. The way he keeps conversations going is he'll say "tell me a story". Or "what is there exciting about you"? And I'm not sure how I feel about that. I mean, obviously we would both like there to be conversation, and not silence, but he backs out and forces me to come up with a new conversation topic. I would be okay with it, but he does it every time there's a lull in the conversation. He was shocked to learn that I'm half Chinese (he literally was taken aback when I told him my last name). But apparently I don't know enough Asian stuff, so he's going to teach me all this Asian stuff? He's shocked that I don't read comics. (Like, he has a thing for over-reacting a little bit. But I think that is going back to the awkward conversation; he doesn't want to seem like he's not interested, so he goes over the top.) Says him, who has a comic book as one of his textbooks and doesn't want to read it -_- I convinced him to watch Frozen though. I told him I would watch the Batman series if he watched Frozen. But it's not like I actually have time to watch movies right now. 92. Do you want to get married? Yes. 93. Who was the last person you held hands with? I have a memory of holding hands recently for a strange reason. Like the reason I had to hold hands was weird, not the fact that I have a memory of it. But I can't get at it. Lethologica. So the clear memory I have of holding hands was with Ryan, who is in my program, my art class and lives in Renison. I am not great friends with Ryan, he's not really the kind of person I would hang out with normally, but I don't know anybody else in my art class, so yeah. We had just come back from our art class and Uthi, a girl on my floor also in GBDA and who is closer to Ryan, was walking through a hall in Renison. Ryan said, "Grab my hand and start skipping. We're going to freak Uthi out." He didn't really give me a chance to even think about what he had said, so skipping down the hall I went, holding hands with Ryan. We both had huge grins on our faces and were acting like we were the happiest couple to ever walk the earth. We passed Uthi and her mouth just dropped. I have to admit, it was pretty funny.
I found these definitions on tumblr. I have no idea whether they're true or if the words even exist. But I like them :) "Proprietary Eponym" is the thing I was talking about here. Sherlock: Character who gives you mixed emotions. Mary Mortsan.
You know I'm bad at communication, it's the hardest thing for me to do
- 2.5 hrs each for econ and business (I'm doing a chapter a day; I thought it would take me 45mins to an hour for each chapter, since I'm just reviewing what I've already read, but it's been taking me at least two hours)
- doing an image for my bookwork assignment for my art class
- which never turns out how I imagine in my brain
- so that just depresses me
- cause my hands are not the artist my brain is
- lack of sleep
- second and third winds, preventing sleep when I can actually have it
- drowning my sorrows in tea and baked goods (Timmies has these really good red velvet muffins right now)
- I like tea better with sugar, I've discovered
- which, you would think, wouldn't be a big deal
- but it is because the caf has sugar
- and I don't. So now if I want tea with sugar, it has to be when the caf is open
- which is never when I feel like tea
- going on an awkward outing with a boy that likes me
- drinking bubble tea on said outing
- which, quite frankly, was disgusting
- the bubble tea, that is
- there's this kind of middle aged man that works at Renison, doing maintenance stuff and odd jobs and whenever I see him, I just smile. Cause he seems like one of those guys that would just be really great to hang out with, like he would always be happy
- tea/sugar update: I've stolen some sugar packages from the caf
- but they're sugar alternatives, so I'm sure it will not be as good
- listening to Coldplay's "Fix You"
- avoiding my 5 hours of studying by writing this post
- oh I also forgot to mention the hour of photoshop tutorials I need to watch
- because heaven forbid I don't know how to use the eraser tool and I need to watch a 5 minute video on it
- complaining to the void (you guys) about my problems
- which are nothing compared to the problems in Africa, which were mentioned in this morning's service
- I'm sitting by a window and these two squirrels keep running back and forth
- two mid-terms, a presentation, three chapter readings, and an assignment all (due) on Friday
- residence weekend brunches are my fav meals of the week because they have baked beans and pastries
- eating said pastries despite the fact that I already had a muffin
- I forgot to mention earlier that the muffin I got from Timmies was fresh baked; that's the pro of being up early, they've just opened and so everything was still warm and soft and gooey on the inside
- listening to Coldplay's "The Scientist"
- this post is taking longer to write that I originally thought
- apparently my time judgement is just completely off these days
- I went to the bank
- but forgot it was Sunday and the morning
- so it was closed
- so I couldn't get the loonies I need for laundry
- so that will be interesting when laundry day comes around (Wednesdays)
- I read on the bus
- because that's the only time I can find to read
- and I've really missed reading
- my tea has gone cold because I've been too busy typing to drink it
- strawberry danish and red velvet muffin down, bread pudding to go
- I was going to try and stop eating to much in the pathetic hopes that I would look half decent in my bathing suit next week
- but to hell with that
- speaking of next week
- I can't even get excited because I have so much stuff to do
- including packing for next week
- which I'm stressing out about
- cause I'll probably forget something important
- like my bathing suit
- and I'm going to have to haul it all to Stratford
- don't even get me started on Stratford right now
- I am just about done with that place
- more specifically the campus/courses/professors
- damn this is taking a long time; listening to Hunter Hayes' "Invisible"
- I just dropped a piece of my bread pudding -_-
- my skind is really dry
- like, never before in my life has my skin been this dry
- the skin over my knuckles is cracking and splitting
- it's not like I needed that skin anyways
- the LEGO Movie got 97% on Rotten Tomatoes
- which makes me really happy
- cause I want to see it
- but now I really want to see it
- just watched The LEGO Movie trailer
- here, you can too:
- yeah and now I'm basically just stalling to avoid work
- oh hey I can do my daily things
- (the squirrels just ran by again)
91. Best room for a fireplace?
a cold one?
Sherlock: Character everyone likes but you don't.
Probably Anderson. Everyone hated him up until season three, where he was the only one who believed in Sherlock. And I really liked learning more about him in this season. But I'm still not a huge fan though.
I'm sitting pretty on the throne / There's nothing more I want / Except to be alone
So today on the bus back to Waterloo I was trying to do some studying for economics. But I was super tired, and kind of nodding off as I was typing notes. Eventually I just fell asleep for like 20 mins. But man, I felt so much better afterwards. Even though I only slept for a short time, I was roaring and ready to go again. Anyways, since I didn't get much studying done on the bus, I did some this evening. I went to pick up where I had fallen asleep and it was like a drunk person had been typing. There were random letters, random words, short coherent sentences, spaces of nothing, etc. It was hilarious.
Also, at dinner, I was sitting alone. There's this guy who sometimes if he sees me eating alone will come sit with me. I'm like 89.7% sure he likes me. He's always, in his own words, "baffled" when he talks to me. And I was like, well so am I so we can just be awkward together. I didn't actually say the awkward together part. But he asked for my number (after asking if I had FB). And so yeah. Interesting story of the day. Heather gets further than ever before in a relationship with a boy (I don't know what you want to call this).
It's 1AM right now, and I'm totally on my third wind. I'm really wound up right now cause all I've been doing for the past 4 hours is typing study notes. I think I may have to go take a walk around Renison. I'm going to start painting for a project I have. Like I said, wound up, not really thinking with the most common sense. Painting at 1AM!
90. Opinions on sex before marriage?
I won't have sex before marriage, but other people are entitled to their own opinions and what they do with their sexual desires. (I've been spending too much time on tumblr...I'm trying to make sure I don't offend anyone and justify my answer...)
Sherlock: Character you love now more than ever before.
Jim Moriarty.
